So, I discovered I was a cocksucker. That day in the book store had shown me that I loved having a cock in my mouth and cum filling my mouth. It showed me that when I was doing my best to please a cock I didn't care who knew. I didn't care who heard me say I wanted to have my mouth used and filled with the results of my attention. And yet, when I left that bookstore I was embarrassed at what I had done. I could not understand how I had become so willing to be used for another man's pleasure.
On the one hand I knew that if my friends, or the women I went out with, or my family knew I had willingly got down on my knees and sucked a cock until it exploded in my mouth I would never live it down. I would be shamed to have them know. They would no longer think of me as a man, but rather a cocksucker... a faggot, even a sissy. And yet. And yet I had cum without touching myself as I worshiped that cock. I was confused. I was scared. I was worried.
I knew I still loved women. I knew that it was amazing to feel my cock slip in to the nice wet, tight, warm depths of a woman's pussy. To explore her body. To feel her nipples harden in my mouth. To taste her juices as I went down on her. And yet. And yet I had cum without touching myself as I worshiped that cock.
I knew I could never do it again or I would surely be what I feared. I would become that faggot. I knew that if I did I would eventually be caught. Someone would see me in that bookstore. Someone I knew would see me go back to the booths and perhaps even feed me their cock through the hole and that my worst fears would come true. And yet. And yet I had cum without touching myself as I worshiped that cock.
Over the next several weeks I avoided any thought of going to that bookstore. But when a day or two would go by without being with a woman and relieving the pressure I would, like most men my age, find myself pleasing myself. And as I stroked my cock and brought myself to release I would without exception find myself thinking about how that cock felt in my mouth. I would have explosive orgasms as a result and the guilt would again flood over me renewing my vow to never let myself do that terrible thing again.
I could not understand why, when I had these fantasies while masturbating, I would never think of the other man sucking my cock, only of sucking theirs. The thrill for me was that act of sucking cock. The thrill for me, I gradually realized, was being used. In being willing to please a man asking nothing in return other than having them reward me with a mouthful of cum. The more I fantasized the more I found my fantasies raising the level of my submission to these men.
Having that man in the bookstore call me a cocksucker had thrilled me. Having him call me a boy, rather than a man, had thrilled me. In my fantasies I heard men calling me those names. Heard men calling me more, like slut, cumslut, cock whore, and even more. I heard those men telling me what a faggot I must be to love sucking cock so much. I heard them telling me I wasn't a man at all, only a sissy that belonged on my knees with a real man's cock in my mouth. I did not know where these fantasies came from. But I knew I loved them and that worried me. I had always thought of myself as a man. I had always thought that I was normal but now I knew there was something different about me. I was submissive. Oh my God, I was submissive. That meant I was less than a man. That meant that I would only be happy being used by others. I started fantasizing about being submissive to women too, and while that also thrilled me it was being used by a man that really turned me on. Was it true? Did I want to be someone's bitch? Even more did I want to be anyone's bitch... everyone's bitch? I realized that I did.
Soon masturbation wasn't enough. I knew eventually I would have to find a way to once again suck cock. I knew I would have to suck lots of cock. I knew I would eventually want to suck everyone's cock. I really was becoming a slut and yet I had only sucked one cock one time. About a month had gone by when I knew I had to go back to that bookstore. And so one day I did.
The same gruff older man was sitting behind the counter and when I walked in he looked up, smiled, and called me over to the counter. I was surprised he remembered me and nervously walked over to the counter, my face growing redder, but my cock growing harder. As I approached the counter he said in a normal voice that sounded to me like he was yelling for everyone to hear, "I wondered if you would come back boy, I wondered if you would be accept how much you loved sucking my cock and come back for more."
I didn't say anything, to embarrassed to respond but my cock throbbed when he called me boy. "Well boy, is that what you came back for? Did you realize how much you loved being a cocksucker?"
My cock running so much precum now that I was going into a trance of excitement I quietly responded in the only way I could. "Yes Sir."
"Then go back to booth 4 boy and I will be back in a few minutes. I have to do a few things first so you just wait for me back there. Oh, and I want you to strip naked once you are in the booth. Boys that suck my cock regularly do so naked boy."
Again I felt like he was shouting loud enough for the world to hear but despite my fear I found myself heading back to the booth area and closing the door to booth 4 behind me. For a few seconds I just stood there in the dark, wondering how far I was going to go with this, but my dripping cock showed me more than anything that this was what I wanted. I wanted to be used by this man. I needed to be used by this man.
As I was reaching for the coin slot the movie came on without my putting any money in. I guess the man that ran the store decided to let me watch for free. The movie showed a boy on his knees with three naked older men standing around him and he was going from one cock to another, sucking each for a few seconds before going to the next. I knew something then. I knew I wanted to be that boy. I wanted to be used not only by the man that ran the store, but by as many men as possible. What was wrong with me? Was I a faggot like I feared? I didn't know, but I knew that submitting like that, to real men, men with cocks that wanted only to cum from my attention was what I needed. Without even thinking about it I found myself undressing.
When I was completely naked I felt both scared that someone would see me, and thrilled at the thought that I was being the slut I had fantasized about. My cock was harder than it had ever been. The precum was flowing freely from it. As I stroked my cock and watched the movie I realized that as small as my cock was compared to those in the film, I really was less of a man. Even the boy in the film, the one being used by these men, had a bigger cock than mine. No woman had ever complained that my cock was small, but it obviously was. And the more I watched, the more I stroked, the more I realized that it was right my cock was small. My cock wasn't there to please anyone. I was there to please everyone. Real cocks, on real men, needed someone like me, someone less than them, someone who was there to give them pleasure.
"What are you standing for boy? Cocksuckers belong on their knees!" I herd the man, suddenly in the next booth, say to me. Without a second thought I dropped to my knees facing the hole in the wall and I knew that soon the man's cock would again be where it belonged. I would again be what I was born to be, his cocksucker. I knew I was his cocksucker. No, not his cocksucker, everyone's cocksucker. I was a cocksucker!
"Are you ready to suck cock boy?" he asked loudly. "Yes Sir" I replied in a whisper.
"I can't hear you boy." he said even louder. "Yes Sir!" I said loud enough to be heard by anyone outside my booth.
"Are you ready to drink my cum again boy?" he said, still with that loud voice. "Yes Sir!" I said louder than I meant to, but not caring who heard.
"What are you boy?" he demanded. "A cocksucker Sir." I responded.
"What are you and what do you want to do boy?" he again demanded.
All my will broke down. All reservation fled. "I am a cocksucker and want to suck your cock and drink you cum Sir." I said.
"Louder," he demanded again, "I want you to tell anyone who can hear what you are boy."
Loud, louder than I meant to, almost at a yell I said "I am a cocksucker Sir. I want to suck your cock! I want you to cum in my mouth and I want to drink it Sir!"
"Damn boy," he said as he slipped his cock through the hole, "you are even a bigger slut than I thought you were. Well get busy, I have a nice load saved for you."
With the thrill of his calling me a slut... yes thrill, I watched as his beautiful cock slipped through the hole and without hesitation I wrapped on hand around it's shaft and brought it to my waiting mouth. As the head slipped in to my mouth I knew, without question, without doubt, this was where I belonged. As his musky taste filled my senses I closed my lips over the head and slid down the length of his cock, taking as much as I could in to my mouth. I ran my tongue along the underside of his cock as it filled my mouth and I felt it pulse in response. I loved his cock in my mouth. I worshipped his cock. I celebrated the feeling of being used by this man. A real man, with a real cock, using me like nothing more than a cheap whore. A real man using my mouth for his pleasure, not caring if it pleased me or not. But pleasing him did please me. I loved being treated like the slut it was now obvious to me I was. I knew then I would never stop sucking cock. I knew I would come back to this store again and again to show this man how much I needed him to use me as his whore.
My cock was as hard as steel. I didn't touch it because I knew the second I did it would explode and I wanted this feeling to last. I wanted to spend as long as I could with this man's cock in my mouth. I wanted to go on and on being used. His cock began to leak precum and once again I was amazed at how much I loved the taste. I loved that he enjoyed my mouth enough to reward it with the salty smooth taste of his essence.
Time became a blur. Reality became a blur. Doubt left me. I am a cocksucker. I am a slut. I am a bitch to be used by real men like this. My ecstasy was total. I was where I belonged. But then as my mind became one with the pleasure of sucking his cock he pulled it from the hole, holding it just out of my reach. Did I do something wrong? Why wasn't he feeding me his cock? Why wasn't he using me as I needed to be used?
"Do you want this cock boy?"
"Please Sir, please let me suck your cock." I pleaded.
"I am tired of this hole boy, if you want my cock then unlock your door and invite me over."
I did, of course I did. I unlocked the door and said, "Please Sir, please come over here and let me suck your cock. I need your cock Sir. Please use me like the slut you showed me I am. Please show me how a real man uses a slut like me. Please Sir..." The words flew out of my mouth. I could not understand where they were coming from, but I was in a frenzy. I had to have his cock in my mouth again. I had to. The world no longer existed. All there was, was his cock and my mouth. All that mattered was his cock again using me. All that counted was this man using his slut, me, like I needed to be used.
No longer did I wonder what was wrong with me. No longer did I care. I was a cocksucker. I knew it, he knew it, I didn't care who knew it. I was proud of it. In a moment the door opened and he walked in, his cock sticking out of his fly, still hard, waiting for me to again worship him. Yes, not just his cock, but worship him. I was nothing without a cock in my mouth. I was nothing unless a man, a real man, was using me for his pleasure.
He took a step toward me and without any hesitation I engulfed his cock. One hand reached around the base, one hand cupped his balls. My mouth slid up and down the length of his cock as I squeezed his shaft and caressed his balls.
I took the cock out of my mouth to look at it. I ran my tongue up and down the length of it and then back down to lick and kiss his balls. I rubbed my face with his cock, leaving trails of precum on my cheeks, forehead and lips. I was outside myself. I imagined what I looked like, naked, on my knees, my little cock, my sissy cock, my faggot cock, my cocksucking cock throbbing as I devoured a real cock. As I worshipped a man's cock. As I served him without question or reservation.
His cock grew harder, leaking even more precum into my mouth and I knew soon I would get my reward. Soon he would be filling my mouth with the cum I craved. His first blast of cum shot to the back of my mouth and he pulled out. As his second shot landed on my face my cock again exploded. As squirt after squirt of cum erupted from my cock, squirt after squirt of a real man's cum covered my face. Landing on my nose, my lips, covering one eye, landing in my hair. Still in a frenzy I quickly started scooping it off my face and sucking my fingers clean. I wanted to swallow all his cum but I loved that he had cum on my face. It added to my submission. After all, no man would allow another man to cum on his face. Only a slut would do that. Only a cocksucker would do that. I was a slut. I was a cocksucker.
I heard him chuckle as he turned and walked out the open door. The open door!!! I hadn't realized he had not closed the door when he came in to my booth. I had only been aware of his cock. I looked up, still on my knees, still licking my fingers clean of his cum and saw there were several men watching, some with amusement, some with lust. A couple men had their cocks out stroking them as they watched me being such a slut.
As my frenzy subsided I again felt embarrassed to have not only so completely showed them all what a slut I was, but to have them see me naked, my cock dripping the cum that being such a slut had caused to appear and kneeling on the cum stained floor of the booth. I couldn't move. I was paralyzed with fear and humiliation. I heard their comments... what a slut... god what a faggot... look at that sissy. Then I heard a clearer voice.
"Damn Bob, I didn't know you were a faggot."